Sorry about spelling and grammar. I'm lazy.
You, with your words like knives
And swords and weapons that you use against me
You have knocked me off my feet again
Got me feeling like I'm nothing
My eyes flutter open at the creek of the floor boards. I pull the blankets over my head and push tight against Daaron.
'honey, what do you want for dinner?' his mom said opening the door.
Daaron sprung to life
'ugh mom! I'm sleeping.' Daaron said as he slipped his arms around me trying to hide me.
'okay, well you can pick something up later then, I'm going out on a date in ten minutes with Art. I love you. Good night.'
She slipped away slowly closing the door. I was silently laying there for at least five minutes.
'dumb ass.' I whisper. ' you told me your mom wouldn't be home tonight.'
'Just shut the hell up! I don't want her to hear you!'
I ignored him. Honestly I didn't even care about Daaron, he was a jerk, but I dealt with it.
We both sighed when the door locked and we could hear the purr of the engine as Mrs. Carson drove off.
You, with your voice like nails on a chalkboard
Calling me out when I'm wounded
You picking on the weaker man
I got up attaching the hook on my bra. 'where is my shirt?' I say
'I dont know, she'll be gone all night now, get back in bed.'
'I have stuff to do, I'm going home.' slipping my shorts on I grab my keys off Daarons crap filled dresser.
Daaron shot up and was in front of me in seconds. 'No, you're not leaving yet.'
'Daaron, stop. I'm serious.' I said trying to push around him.
'Me too!' he said grabbing my wrists. I know that was it, what Daaron wants Daaron gets. I looked up at the gorgeous 6'7 giant. Perfect skin, eyes, and even hair. All you could ask for, but when he wanted something he got it. he shoved me to the bed, I gave up and let him win.
Someday I'll be living in a big ol' city
And all you're ever gonna be is mean
Someday I'll be big enough so you can't hit me
And all you're ever gonna be is mean
Why you gotta be so mean?
'Get up!' Daaron said sharply awakening me immediately.
I jumped up and looked around confused.
'Vikkie will be here soon, you gotta go.'
I pushed forward and wrapped my arms around his waist, 'One more, for the road?' I smiled devilishly.
'No, get you shit together put your clothes on and leave. Really.' I sighed.
'Well okay then.' I put my clothes on and grabbed my keys, 'Fuck you.' I said as I walked out Daarons room.
'Yeah, you can later babe.' he said sarcastically.
'After the girlfriend leaves, right?' I yell upstairs as I leave. 'Nah, no more.' I said closing his front door.
I jumped into my jeep turned my music up and sped off. I know I deserve better but I never treated myself any better. I used to like Daaron. When I was younger, maybe a year ago, I really liked him. Then I slept with him, since then, even after he's had girl friends and I've had boyfriends we keep each other around for the sex and the cheap talk of a 'someday' that we know will never happen.
'this is getting old' I mutter to myself. I wanted to break it off, but part of me would miss the sex too much and another was scared of how angry Daaron would be.
You, with your switching sides
And your wildfire lies and your humiliation
You have pointed out my flaws again
As if I don't already see them
I walk with my head down
Trying to block you out 'cause I'll never impress you
I just wanna feel okay again
'Hey, you should come over.' Daaron whispers through my phone. It's 2:30am Saturday night.
'Daaron. It's late.'
'Now, or I'll be over there in five minutes.'
'I'm grabbing my keys now.' I hang up. I push myself out my bed, dress and then down the stairs, I remember when these kinds of calls meant the world to me, now however I've become a slave.
'hey, nice hair.' he said as I walked into his room. He was right, I normally straightened my hair everyday, but right now my curls fell loosely around my chest almost untamed.
'Yeah, yeah. Don't be a jerk.' he walked upwards me and pulled at my tank top, '' 'Member When we met?' I said
'No, I don't.' Daaron said unbuttoning my jean shorts.
'How can you not remember?'
'It wasn't a big deal?'
'how long have been doing this shit?' I say shoving his hands off my body,
'Damn it! Scar! Come on. Let's not do this.'
'Daaron! It matters to me.'
He grabbed waist and shoved my back to the wall. 'Are you drunk Daaron?!' I shout.
'I want you. If I wanted a self righteous bitch, I'd call Vikki. Scarlett, just screw the feelings. We both know it's not like that.'
'No, I'm done. This will never go anywhere!' I run for the door. Too late.
Darkness.
I bet you got pushed around
Somebody made you cold
But the cycle ends right now
Cause you can't lead me down that road
And you don't know, what you don't know...
I wake up. Daarons room. Sit up, I look over to his vanity.
'Shit..' I see my face in the mirror. A big cut on my cheek and a newly painted black eye.
'Im sorry..' I hear a whisper, I look down.
'What the he'll is wrong with you?' I scream. 'This, us, WE ARE DONE!' I stand up and wobble in fear. Daaron doesn't move.
'I...love...you..'
'Hell no. You don't hit people you love Daaron.'
All you are is mean
And a liar, and pathetic, and alone in life
And mean, and mean, and mean, and mean
I stumble out and into my jeep. In that moment I let out three years of pain. I cry like I never have, Daaron, the man I love, hit me. He could hurt me and I couldn't even say no. I walked away that night, broken but so much stronger. Why'd you have to be so mean?
